I feel like this is a pretty important piece of work I have to tackle with you, ladies and gents. I may not be the best person to talk about it, but I do have some experience regarding this one. Two failed relationships with immature me and immature men, two heart breaks and one huge singleness later, I am ready to write something about it.
First things first, I have news for you. It’s not new or anything, but this is probably great advice: don’t look at all. I am serious. Don’t go searching for that knight in shining armor. He probably doesn’t exist anyway. I don’t mean the figurative knight in shining armor either. No guy could have that persona and be real. This goes the same for the guys. No woman is as perfect, not even half of those you see in porn videos. Normal bodies don’t work out that way, not at least majority of them anyway.
Now, that we get that out of the way, you may now proceed or stop reading altogether. Do you still want to continue? Really? Sure? Okay. Good.
Knight is non-existent, yes. But there is someone that’s exactly for you. Don’t misunderstand me. You are not misreading. There is someone for you. Someone. For. You. For as long as it’s in the plan, there is a man or a woman for you. Take that from me and the many people who can attest to the fact.
There is a reason why you are experiencing all this pain, all this hardship that never seems to end: the loneliness of being single, the stress at work, the pressure with keeping with the deadlines, the headache of balancing and coping up with difficult people. The reason is that all of that is going to mold you into the better person you can be. Just cooperate with it. Don’t just sit there, bear it and grin. Embrace the pain and the hurt. Take the good with the bad.
While you are at it, remember, too, that this life is more than just getting a spouse. A husband or a wife cannot give you the joy that you so elusively are looking for. If you cannot find it in the family, in money, in fame or fortune, how you are supposed to think that you are going to find it in an imperfect person like you? Yes, I know, I know. You are beautiful and you are most definitely deserved to be loved a hundred percent. That is true. All I am saying is that, you cannot hope to fill up your hole with romantic relationships, sex or children or the security from marriage. This is also true.
Is it wrong to desire these things? No. Is it wrong to dress up, train as a wife and mother and save up for such? Or investing in a house and getting a good for your future kids? No, no, no, no and no. These desires are valid, my dear. You were made to be that way. Just don’t make them your life’s goal.
Being single is the best time to do things. That’s what my married friends say, over and over. I’ve heard that so many times I could say it in my sleep. Enjoy your single, your life, your now. Now, after eleven years of selfish romantic relationship, I finally agree. I am enjoying every bit of being single, without any attachment whatsoever. I wished I could have gone back to rewind it all.
While you are it, too, keep yourself pure, untainted by sexual experimentation or whatnot. Your virginity will be the best gift you give to your husband or your wife. I am not saying about just the physical aspects either. Save your mind, your heart and your body, and set them toward future grace. Keeping away from porn will do wonders for your soul. It will detox you into finer things, lead you away from destructive habits, insecurities, and that desensitization that are so prevalent today. You think porn will not hurt you today, well, that may be true. However, it will not be true in the future. Just try envisioning this: in the middle of your making love with your spouse, an image from the past pops up and it compares your spouse with another person, someone more skilled in making love. Will you not come down unsatisfied? Can you not help but compare?
This is just a sneak peek. I gave you that example because I’ve been there before.
Perhaps you think I am lecturing you. Well, I am actually, in the hopes I may be able to change your mind from doing any of the mistakes I’ve done in the past. I wish somebody told me about these when I was younger. But I was so foolish and stubborn, and there was nobody I could talk about these things. Well, now, I am.
I know also how hard it can be, how hard it is to be good. Here’s the good part. You don’t have to worry about it. If you think you’re not getting it but would like to try being virgins again, join me.
I would like you to know about my God. He created heaven and earth. He was the one who lifted me up, from all the heavy porn addiction and that deep longing for a husband. I was heading toward a wide path destined for my destruction, one that lined up with naked bodies and easy desires. He suddenly zoomed me in and He took my mind, my body and my heart into His peace. My hole was so filled, it overflowed. And what overflow that was, my dear. It was bittersweet and wonderful. It was filling me up over and over. It is still filling me up. God heard my cry and He comforted me. He loves you so much, my dear. So much that it hurts for me even to rethink about it. For God SO love the world, my dear, that He gave His own Son. He did not spare His Son. I’ve seen how mothers instinctively protect their babes and I wonder how hard it must be for this heavenly Father to part with His own Son! He gave His own Son, that anyone who believes in Him shall not perish about have eternal life, my dear.
Perhaps you may think this is religious BS, well, I don’t blame you. I understand where you are coming from, too. But if this is touching your heart, let Him save you from all these, too.
Written and Edited Thanks to Powersun Consultants